That time I met Maria Bamford & insisted she immediately know I'm mentally ill
Hello Psychos,
So this one is embarrassing lol. I’m probably blowing it up bigger in my head than how it actually transpired, but, regardless, I’m going to come clean…
First, though, here’s a quick excerpt from my solo show that makes me look GOOD! It’s a section from the serious part. I’m including it almost as a disclaimer lol. It’s the only way I can muster up the courage to share the utter cringe that follows.
“I have to say that, although it may sound silly, getting to be a comedian has been crucial to my well being. I honestly think that it has saved my life. Being able to laugh and make comedy out of all of this pain and literal insanity, that’s been a blessing. Getting groups of people to laugh with me, on my terms, about what I’ve been through has had the effect of helping to heal my vulnerability and shame. It’s allowed me to regain confidence and my sense of self.
Also, talking publicly about my Bipolar Disorder has had the effect of making other people feel less alone about something they may be going through. That means the world to me. If I can use comedy to destigmatize mental illness and maybe save some folks from going through some of the heartache that I’ve gone through, that sounds pretty good to me. That makes me feel good about myself. I find redemption in that.”
Alright, so now that I’ve made it crystal clear that I’m a GOOD person lol, here are the details of my cringeworthy interaction with one of my comedy heroes…
The great Maria Bamford was recently in NYC working out her new hour of material. She was actually doing shows at an intimate 50 seat venue at 10am. Yes, stand up at 10am! I went to a show. It was so fun and Maria was so hilarious.
For those of you who may not know, Maria Bamford is a truly brilliant and unique comedian who has talked openly about her mental health struggles and has been a source of inspiration to many, including myself.
After her performance, Maria stood in the hallway and very graciously said thank you and goodbye to everybody as they exited. Here and there, people would stop to say a quick word and/or take a picture. I purposefully waited until almost everybody else had left because I HAD to talk to Maria. More specifically, I HAD to make myself KNOWN to Maria. I needed her to be aware that I too use comedy to destigmatize mental illness; that I too am fighting the same good fight as she is. Basically, I was beyond thirsty for her recognition lol.
I was like, “Maria, I really appreciate what you do. I also talk about mental health a lot in my comedy. I’m doing really well these days, but I have Bipolar Disorder.” I made sure to let Maria know that I had a severe chronic mood disorder within 20 seconds of meeting her lol!!! I couldn’t help myself!!! Of course, she was so kind about it. She said something to the effect of, “That’s great what you’re doing with comedy. And I’m really glad you’re doing well with the Bipolar stuff.” And that was it. That was the entirety of our interaction. Well, that was the entirety of our FIRST interaction.
About 15 minutes later, I saw Maria on the street waiting for her Uber. I approached and proceeded to immediately tell her one of my bits. OH MY GOD!! WHAT WAS I THINKING?! I’ve been doing stand up for over 20 years, and I’m not one to usually be starstruck, let alone to be green enough to BIT OUT on another comedian. I know better than this. Again, Maria was completely gracious. I was rambling to her about my Bipolar Disorder Song bit. She said, “That sounds great. I’ll have to look it up.” That’s what she said! She said she would look it up. Sooooo kind. What a gem of a human being. Truly. Then, she was totally cool about us getting a picture together.
Here’s the thing. I’m pretty sure Maria vaguely, if at all, recalls any of this. It certainly wasn’t a big deal for her, but it was a big deal for me. Maria has helped so many people by talking about mental health through her comedy. I respect that so much. It’s exactly what I pride myself on trying to do. And for some reason (see: egoism) it was just really important to me that Maria knew that about me. And I think it’s fair to say, at least during our brief interactions, I certainly made sure that she did lol…
Maria Bamford, you are a class act all around, and I’m sorry if I freaked you out. I’m just grateful to say that, comedically, we’re in the same sandbox. Although, you have a lot more sand ;-)
Sincerely,
JFOD